Prompt: Graduation is a major milestone. What does high school graduation mean to you?
I’m graduating in less than three months.
That’s crazy. I was 15 when the pandemic hit. Now, I’m almost 18.
I constantly hear juniors say “I’m 17? Whoa. It means I’ll turn 18 next year,” “It doesn’t feel like I’ll be a senior next year,” or even “I’m not ready to be a senior.” I understand why they say that. Even as I’m on the verge of turning 18, I still mentally do not feel like a senior. While I am not the same as my 15 year-old self, I feel like I should still be 15. It does not feel like high school is about to run out. It does not feel like I’m about to be an adult. In fact, I don’t want to be.
High school graduation, in a literal sense, means a person has earned all their credits in high school. It means receiving a diploma. But high school graduation isn’t just about that. It isn’t just about completing a K-12 education. High school graduation signifies both an ending and a new beginning. It means going into the next phase in life after a chapter in life has closed.
That’s what I’m afraid of. It causes some discomfort.
I only ever hang out with people at school. It saddens me knowing that I’m likely never going to see any of them again—the classmates I’ve grown up alongside since either elementary school or middle school as well as my friends. After high school ends, we’re all going our separate ways. We’re all growing up, maturing, and moving on. We’re all venturing off into unknown territories.
New days come and they fade away. I don’t know what the rest of my life will bring, but the more I roam, the more I want to look behind and stay right where I am. Creating a new life after high school will be hard when I am accustomed to the lifestyle I have now. My class rank is 13 of 412 according to Aeries; I strive for the highest grades. I don’t find school enjoyable, but I am used to focusing on it. With me about to graduate, I need to figure out how to move forward to make sense of my life.
Graduation means the start of adulthood. It means having to pay bills, taxes, insurance. It means harsher consequences. It means working more than I ever had before. Graduation means I am no longer on the free trial of life. It means I have to start paying for the full version.
A future I scarcely know is about to arrive. I’m about to start a new chapter that hasn’t been written yet.
The ever-changing outside world in the rear-view mirrors is closer than it appears.
Word Count: 457
It’s crazy how time flies. I totally resonate with not mentally feeling like your age, and this fear of change. Your description is very vivid and completely portrays how I feel at times. While growing up and moving to a new chapter may come off as scary, who’s to say that the next chapter won’t be better? Chin up, you got this :)
ReplyDeleteOnline learning didn’t really feel like school, and that caused a lot of people to feel like they’re a grade lower than they’re supposed to be. Time just stopped for others. I agree that starting adulthood sounds scary, but it’s just another checkpoint in our lives. I’m sure you’ll meet new people you can be friends with and hang out with. Good luck and congratulations on graduating!
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